I have removed most of this post, as the situation that led to my making it has now been resolved. I will leave the last bit in, however, as it’s more personal and less identifiable… For many years I have excused someone’s bad behaviour, knowing that it is beyond their control, but I’ve just haven’t recognised the impact on the other people who also have to live with it. And it has had a huge negative impact, which I need to acknowledge and try to redress, if it isn’t too late. This isn’t going to be easy, because I shall be swimming against the tides of mainstream society; luckily this will not be for the first time, so I have some idea what to expect and how to go about it! I will have to brave the disapproval of my family & friends, who have very little idea of what’s really been going on. I am afraid; I have been afraid of doing this for a very long time, but I’ve faced a growing certainty that I must do this for several years now. I’m in that awful moment where I have to place my trust in something/someone I can’t be sure of, and step over that abyss, because things are piling up behind me and there is no way but forwards…
It’s not that I’m unsure of God, just that I’m unsure of what I’m supposed to be doing and how. I’ve tried all the obvious things, and everything else I can think of too, and got absolutely nowhere. Ah well, He never promised us an easy ride…
Tags: bad behaviour
